You’re not that special with ‘your’ shame

Last night we gathered in the Women’s Circle to celebrate the Feast Day of Mary Magdalene. And my heart is still full. Overflowing, actually, with love and joy.

I’ve trained as a Priestess of the Venusian Rose, with Isis, Mother Mary, Mary Magdalene, Inanna and more divine feminine as guides, but I am in constant awe of being able to hold space for those who feel the call to reconnect with the true essence of their being.

I pulled last night, and again this morning while cleaning up, from the Divine Feminine oracle deck, my beautiful Rose guide – Inanna, Queen of Heaven and Earth. She brings the energy of I have nothing to hide. I love and accept myself, all that I am.

It landed exactly where it needed to.

Because shame doesn’t announce itself like fear does.

It’s quieter than that. It’s the part of you that edits the story before anyone else can judge it first — the version of you that manages the reveal, softens it, times it, makes it palatable, instead of just letting it be seen.

So what does the body know that the mind resists? That shame is a survival response. Somewhere, staying small, hiding, kept you safe. Kept you loved, or at least kept you from being cast out. Your nervous system learned the pattern and kept running it long after the danger passed.

And to bring some common humanity into this – sorry, I love you, but you’re not that special with your shame. You are not the only one feeling it. We’ve all had moments of shame. I don’t think there’s anyone in the western (maybe even whole!) world who’s gone through life without being shamed – by other people, by societal norms, by their own internal dialogue.

And yet. There are people who do what’s needed despite feeling the shame. How did they do it? Some were desperate, and had to push through it to do what they needed to do. And guess what – they survived! They realised the fears of being judged were only ever in their heads, not in reality.

Others, less desperate but wanting to contribute to their community, learnt to recognise shame in their bodies and gradually released it. This is why regulation comes first in my work, always – before identity, before values, before any of the “who am I really” questions. You settle the system enough that being fully seen stops registering as threat. Only then does the deeper work hold.

Releasing shame isn’t a dramatic unveiling. It’s smaller than that, and slower. It’s staying in the room after you say the true thing instead of laughing it off. It’s letting someone catch you mid-process, not just the polished after.

Inanna’s message wasn’t really new information. It was permission to actually believe it.

Nothing about you needs to be hidden to be loved.

The parts you’ve been managing – that’s exactly where you’ve been waiting for yourself.

Nothing to hide. All of you, accepted. That’s the invitation I’m carrying into this week, and one I hope you’ll sit with too.

With love,
Karolina